Cary's November-December newsletter is now online at http://carybayer.com/newsletter.html
Wishing you a
Happy Holiday Season!
1051 Hillsboro Mile, Apt. 604,
Hillsboro Beach, FL 33062
Woodstock, NY 12498
"Everyone who will can hear the Voice. It is within everyone, but like everything else, it requires previous and definite preparation."
Trump Lampoons (That Mexico's Gonna Pay For) Mini-Book Published; 20%-Off Sale on Procrastination Book in Nov.;
Webinar on Gaining New Healing Arts Clients; Free Coaching; Affirmations; Designer Wanted For Next Book on Coaching; Quote from the "Experts;" Quotes of the Month; Breakthroughs; The Cosmic and Comic; Factoid; Testimonial about Coaching;
Column: "Stand-up Consciousness: Comedians as Philosophers;" Schedule of Classes; Meditation Training now Available by Webcam; Want to Write a Book?; Higher Self Healing Meditation; Blog Cabin; Face to Face to Facebook; Referral Fees; Books and CDs
TRUMP LAMPOONS (THAT MEXICO'S GONNA PAY FOR) MINI-BOOK PUBLISHED
This mini-book contains 15 chapters that send up the Donald, the man who would be king, despite his difficulty controlling what comes out of his mouth. Satirical essays include: "President Trump's Inaugural Address," "Decrees from the Donald," "Trumpxit," a la Brexit, and "Trump Box Office," a 24-hour movie channel, featuring such film classics as Plaza Tweet, A Facework Orange, and Runaway Brain.
The 83-page book sells for $12, plus $3 for shipping & handling. You can also order it directly by calling me at (845) 664-1883, emailing me at firstname.lastname@example.org or on my website at
PROCRASTINATION BOOK ON SALE FOR 20% OFF IN NOVEMBER
To celebrate November, the month that celebrates the anniversary of my learning to meditate, I'm introducing a 20% off sale of my procrastination book I wrote last year to give people clarity on how to overcome procrastination.
In 158 pages, these 22 chapters depict different aspects of overcoming the procrastination that has swelled to epidemic proportions in our country, which is fast becoming a "procrasti-nation." This book includes a curative program that involves a fun game to overcome something that you habitually delay doing, an insidious habit that causes anxiety, insomnia, and a host of health problems. The book also includes the 15-minute preventive Procrastination Aerobics program that enhances well-being and makes it much more difficult for it to emerge in your life.
The book normally costs $20, but is available during the entire month of November for just $16. Usual shipping & handling of $3 per book applies for all U.S. addresses. To take advantage of this offer let me know by email email@example.com or by phone 845-664-1883
as my website store's shopping cart won't be adjusted to take into account this month-long sale.
Webinar to Gain New Healing Arts Clients
On November 7, my 4-CE seminar,
"How to Gain New Healing Arts Clients" will begin.
(Massage therapists will get 4 CEs.)
It takes place from 8:30-9:30 PM eastern time–
with ALL sessions recorded for playback at your convenience.
Dates for the webinar are:
Mondays November 7, 14, 21, & 28.
In this 4-part webinar, you'll learn:
- specific mental techniques to awaken your Success Consciousness that will transform you into a perpetual client magnet
- how to turn almost anyone you meet into a client
- how to comfortably network to tap a powerful referral stream
Uniquely qualified to grow a healer's business, I was
- the keynote speaker at the American Massage Therapy Association national convention
- the marketing coach for more than 400 different healers, the author of the Grow a Rich Massage Business trilogy of books, as well as Healer, Heal Thyself
This class cost $120 in the past, but is being priced now for just:
$49.99 if payment is in by October 25, a saving of more than $70
$59.99 if payment is received by November 1, a saving of more than $60. $69.99 after.
I've coached Oscar-winners Alan Arkin (Little Miss Sunshine) and Pietro Scalia (JFK, Black Hawk Down), Emmy-winners comic/director David Steinberg (Academy Awards presentations) and Judy Henderson (Homeland), and Quality Inns. I also owned a marketing and public relations firm for 18 years, and was in charge of the company's New Business Program.
I write columns regularly on marketing, coaching, and success for Massage Today and for massage publications in 14 states. My CE classes have been popular with MTs throughout the country, and now you can enjoy them from the comfort of your very own home.
You can register for the course by emailing firstname.lastname@example.org or by calling (845) 664-1883.
To celebrate November, the month I learned meditation many moons ago, I'm offering a complimentary half-hour coaching session for the first person who contacts me by phone (845-664-1883), or by email at email@example.com who wants to have some breakthroughs in his or her life. It's my way of giving thanks for the great life that I'm blessed to live. There are only four restrictions, but please read them carefully:
1) You haven't already received a free coaching session from me.
2) You're not currently involved in a series of coaching sessions with me.
3) You book the session within three days of winning, so if you call or email, check my response and respond in time. If you forget to do this, someone on the waiting list will take your place, as happens from time to time.
4) You take the session before November 15.
Here are several affirmations from my series on procrastination, success, relationships, communication, and the inner journey, which are available in five mini-books and three CDs.
"My marriage nurtures both my mate and me."
–Affirmations make the Heart Grow Fonder
Are you the Designer for my Next Book on Breakthrough Coaching?
I'm close to completing a book on Breakthrough Coaching that will be published some time in 2017. Would you like to be the designer for that book? If you or someone you know might be interested, pls. contact me at (845) 664-1883 or by email at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Quote from the "Expert"
"The horse is here to stay but the automobile is only a novelty – a fad."
–President of the Michigan Savings Bank
Quote of the Month
"It was not possible to formulate the laws of quantum mechanics in a fully consistent way without reference to the consciousness."
— Eugene Wigner,
Nobel prize winning physicist and mathematician
The TV ad campaign for the Volvo S90 quotes sections of Walt Whitman's "Song of the Open Road," one of the most spiritually awakened poems in the English language.
The Cosmic & The Comic
"God likes to watch. He's a prankster."
–The Devil in The Devil's Advocate
The human body contains nearly 100 trillion cells.
40% Off Sale on 4 Entertainment Mini-Books
I'm offering a 40% off sale on four different 48-page mini-books. Some of their contents have been expanded and incorporated into the full-length entertainment book, so they're being discontinued. The titles are:
Pop Music, Transcendence, & Meditation
Zen Teachings of the Movies
Archetypes of the Comic Book Unconscious
Zen Teachings of Superheroes
So, while supplies last, each of these titles is on sale through this offer only for just $6. A $2.50 shipping & handling fee per item applies as usual for all US addresses.
You can only take advantage of this sale by emailing me at email@example.com or by calling me at (845) 664-1883. Don't try to purchase it through the website, as prices won't be changed there.
Testimonial on Coaching
"Cary Bayer, to put it simply, is about love. He brings it to his friendships, his coaching, and his classes. Coupled with his awareness of human behavior, one cannot help feeling safe, protected, and in good hands when engaged in one of his sessions."
–Lisa Offman, Tennis Coach, Ossining, NY
Syndicated "Life 101" Column
The column below ran in syndication in a variety of wellness publications, including Arizona Together http://www.arizonatogether.com/ in the past.
Stand-up Consciousness: Comedians as Philosophers
"Life is a tragedy in close-up, but a comedy in long shot."
TV host Art Linkletter used to say that sometimes "Kids say the darnedest things." I like to say that sometimes comedians say the wisest things. As someone who's taught meditation for decades so that people can awaken to the Cosmic, and who's done stand-up comedy, I'm happy to offer this small sample of some very funny stand-ups on the nature of consciousness, Reality, God, the Universe, time, and so forth. It's a chapter in my most recent book, The Yoga of Entertainment: Higher Consciousness in Pop Culture.
"I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way around Chinatown."
"I was thrown out of NYY for cheating on my metaphysical final. I looked within the soul of the boy sitting next to me."
"I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it by not dying."
"When it comes to God's existence, I'm not an atheist and I'm not an agnostic. I'm an acrostic: the whole thing puzzles me."
"I intend to live forever, or die trying."
"A man was trying to understand the nature of God and asked Him: 'God, how long is a million years to you?' God answered, 'A million years is like a minute.' Then the man asked, 'God, how much is a million dollars to you?' And God replied, 'A million dollars is like a penny.' So the man asked, 'God, could you give me a penny?' And God said, 'In a minute.'"
SWAMI BEYONDANANDA (AKA STEVE BHAERMAN)
"I have figured out how to communicate with my twin who lives in a parallel universe — send him a parallelogram."
"There are two kinds of mystics in the world — the optimystics and the pessimystics. The pessimystics are very much in touch with reality, but the optimystics are happier and live longer for some reason."
"We are not here to earn God's love, we're here to spend it!"
"I believe we were created to evolve. Otherwise Jesus would have said, 'Now don't do a thing till I return.'"
"We are here to manifest our destiny as a humanity — to re-grow the Garden from the grassroots up, and have a heaven of a time doing it."
"Sorry, I don't make predictions. I don't want to jeopardize my non-prophet status."
"Why is it that when we talk to God we're said to be praying, but when God talks to us we're schizophrenic?"
"The best mind altering drug is the truth."
"All those who believe in psychokinesis–raise my hand."
"I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time."
"If you tell a joke in the forest, but nobody laughs, was it a joke?"
"If you are in a spaceship that is traveling at the speed of light, and you turn on the headlights, does anything happen?"
"I was a peripheral visionary. I could see the future, but only way off to the side."
"I need one of those baby monitors from my subconscious to my consciousness so I can know what the hell I'm really thinking about."
"If it's the Psychic Network why do they need a phone number?"
THE WISE GUY SWAMI (AKA CARY BAYER)
"India has the Sat guru, America has the meditation guru, and Australia has the kan guru."
"The journey of a thousand miles gets you to about northern Virginia."
"Native Americans began their ceremonies by asking for blessings from the four directions. They're the last men on our continent to ask for directions."
"In case you wind up dying today, take a flashlight wherever you go. There's a power outage in Heaven, so the light at the end of the tunnel is out."
"Give a man a fish, feed him for a day. Teach him how to fish, he'll have a lifetime of smelling badly."
"A joyful channeler is a happy medium."
"A religious friend is half Muslim, half Jewish. Four times a day he prays to Challah."
"If you insult a dead man who was cremated does he turn over in his urn?
Want to Write a Book?
New Publishing Venture Set up for You to Fulfill that Dream
How would you like to have your own book published and available on Amazon? That dream can now become a reality, with the help of on-demand publishing technology, and the writing, editing, graphic design, and marketing and public relations team that I've put in place for that very purpose.
Here's the team that's set up for you:
- A graphic designer who has worked for Disney World, Harley Davidson, and Touchstone Pictures, among other credits. She's also a complete joy to work with, as I can attest–she was the designer on my most recent book, 40 Days to a Happy Life.
- A writer/editor who's been a columnist for The Motley Fool, the editor-in-chief for Mortgageloan.com, Completegrowth.com, and Creditland.com, who has edited five books and was the ghost writer on one. She also wrote for such Fortune 500 companies as Merrill Lynch, Morgan Stanley, Charles Schwab, Prudential, and the Hartford, among others.
- Also on the team as a writer is yours truly. I've written five full-length books and more than three dozen mini-books.
- The venture's book publicist has helped authors make the best-seller lists of the New York Times and the Wall Street Journal, and has had her clients featured on Oprah, The Today Show, Good Morning, America, Time, Newsweek, Business Week, Forbes, NPR, Redbook, and Ladies' Home Journal, among others. She's worked for such authors as Jack Canfield and Jacqueline Miller, Heart at Work (McGraw-Hill); Terri Orbuch, 5 Simple Steps to Take Your Marriage from Good to Great (Random House); Sophy Burnham, The Path of Prayer: Reflections on Prayer and True Stories of How It Affects Our Lives (Viking Penguin); and Charles Garfield, Susun Weed, Gerald Celente, and Drs. Susan Lark, Ro Brock, and Stephen Sinatra, among others, and for authors who've been published by virtually every major publishing house in America.
If you'd like to talk about how you can have a dream come true and have your own book or mini-book in print, and would either like to write it or have someone ghost write it for you, don't hesitate to call at (954) 788-3380, or email me at firstname.lastname@example.org. We're here to make that dream of yours come true.
Higher Self Healing Meditation
I'm proud to announce the development of a new meditation training that's been marinating in the quietest levels of consciousness deep within my soul for a number of years. Its name is Higher Self Healing Meditation, and it's as effortless as Transcendental Meditation (TM) that Maharishi Mahesh Yogi trained me to teach when I was 20 years old.
Some years back, the movement that teaches the late Maharishi's system of TM significantly changed the requirements for those who had been teaching to continue to do so. As a result, thousands of others, including myself, no longer instruct that method. But understanding the mechanics of how the mind transcends in meditation after teaching meditation to so many hundreds of people from southern California and Western Europe to the Caribbean and many points in between–as well as training dozens of teachers of Transcendental Meditation–I've developed a system of meditation that's as effective as TM, as easy as TM, and available at one third the price that it costs to learn TM.
Have you thought about incorporating a daily stress-management system to:
- release deep-rooted tension,
- increase energy,
- stimulate creativity,
- enliven happiness, and
- enable you to contact the inexhaustible reservoir of creativity and intelligence deep within you at the transcendental level of Being?
If so, let me know, and I can explain how easy it is to learn over the course of five hours in three consecutive days. You can reach me by email at email@example.com or by phone at (845) 679-5526.
I have my site set up properly, and I've begun to write regularly. If you would like to have my blog entries emailed to you, there's a place on my website where you can enter your email address: http://carybayer.com/blog/.html
Face to Face to Facebook
With the Internet being a much faster means of transport than the Interstate highways that I find myself on each month, the World Wide Web is, like rock 'n' roll, here to stay, and presumably, also will never die. That being the case, I've recently created a page on Facebook that can help you more deeply understand the ancient wisdom behind meditation. The page is called
Higher Self Healing Meditation.
You can like it at https://www.facebook.com/higherselfhealingmeditation/?ref=hl
Let me know what you think of my posts.
When I ran my own marketing/PR firm, I loved thanking anyone who referred a new client to me, by sending a check for 10 percent of the fees generated. I have a similar policy as a life coach, a meditation teacher, and the writer of books for others. If you inspire someone to become a client of mine for coaching or book writing, or a meditation student, you'll receive 10 percent of the fee that that person begins with me at. That could easily mean a check for you of $105 or $65 for coaching, for $50 for meditation, and hundreds of dollars for book publishing. It's my way of saying, "thanks." My thought is simple–who couldn't use a piece of unexpected income?
Growth Products from Cary Bayer
Love & Light,