The Prophet of Profit,
The Futurist from the Future
“Channeled” By Cary Bayer, Business Coach, & Author, The Prosperity Aerobics
Directed by Barbara Eisner Bayer
Businesses have long sought the advice of futurists like Faith Popcorn, who see what has not yet taken place. How can one have faith in popcorn, what with the weird stuff they use for butter? Imagine how businesses could profit if somehow they could gain the advice of someone who not only sees the future, but who’s come from it.
To listen to an interview with the Business Oracle in the Sept. 2007 “museletter” of Idea Champions Click on Selection 4. “Playful/Humorous”
Comedian Cary Bayer portrays two characters in his comedy performances:
The Wise Guy Swami, 4,000 Year Old Cosmic Comic,
The Disembodiment of Heaven & Mirth &
Author, The Lost Teachings of the Oy Veda
Learn more and get booking information on The Wise Guy Swami
Imagine no more. Meet The Business Oracle, a master of prescience with the wisdom and accent of an Indian swami and the lightning quickness of Groucho Marx. He’s currently “channeled” by Cary Bayer, a longtime business coach.
The Prophet of Profit has had countless adventures in the future. He comes from a time that we haven’t yet seen to make sense of your present, and dollars in your future.
A walking Ouija board, he advises boards of directors how to steer their companies onto his Good Fortune 500 list. Those are businesses that will thrive and prosper because of wise management.
Some compare the comic jazz musician to a summer’s day–an audience with him is like a day at the beach minus the sand. He’s also been likened to a mustard seed, because he goes well with cold cuts.
The Business Oracle answers questions from executives who deposit huge sums into his channel’s secret Swiss bank account. His improvisational riffs help business people see that it’s not gravity that keeps things together on our planet, so much as levity. “Force, farce, business is play,” he says, awakening the lightness inside us to laugh at the marketplace’s Divine Comedy. Sometimes people don’t know if they’re being entertained or enlightened. “You think they’re so different?” he asks with an invisible wink.
The Oracle is author of The One Millisecond Manager and The Millionaire Next Galaxy.
He holds a BS from Harvard in B.S., and an Ascended Masters degree from William & Mary & Jesus College.
Critics Throughout History
“I understand chaos; the Business Oracle understands cosmos.”
“There was something rotten in the state of Denmark, so we brought in the Business Oracle to consult. He discovered that what was rotten were a dozen eggs that had been left out way too long.”
–Hamlet, Prince of Denmark
“Cary Bayer performs in the guise of the Business Oracle, who offers the audiences proverbs and jokes in an Indian accent.”
– -Time Magazine
“I learned some great coping techniques, and the value of looking at things through a different, more fun-filled and light way. Doing this will help me maintain a cool, more stress-free and joyous life.”
–Rev. Kathleen Bishop, Ph.D, Unity by the Ocean, Ft. Lauderdale, FL
“I highly recommend the Business Oracle in any entertainment venue you may be considering. I am sure he will thrill and delight your audience, leaving them feeling enlightened, with a new-perhaps more comical look-at life and themselves.”
–Tina Rappaport, Director, W.E.C.A.R.E., Soref Jewish Community Center, Ft. Lauderdale, FL
“The Business Oracle was just what the doctor ordered for many of us who live stressful lives.”
–Rev. Paula Hittan-McLaury, United Metaphysical Church of the Palm Beaches, West Palm Beach, FL
The “Channel”: Cary Bayer
There are 4 reasons Cary Bayer was chosen as the Oracle’s channel:
- He’s taught people to actualize their potential since 1973;
- He’s written and performed comedy since childhood, which was considerably before 1973;
- The Oracle’s ex-channel went belly up in the cable shake-up;
A TM Teacher since 1973, Cary has shown thousands of people how to manage their stress. An international Success Coach since 1988, he’s guided countless businesses and executives to create breakthroughs in their sales, their management and their careers.
Earlier in his career, he headed up the communications department of Doyle Dane Bernbach International, the ninth largest advertising agency network in the world. He also ran his own communications company for 18 years, working for such clients as Oscar-winner Alan Arkin, David Steinberg, Quality Inns, and Inc. magazine, among others.
Cary writes columns for many personal growth-oriented publications; has been an editor for Adweek, and written for Advertising Age. He’s written humor for National Lampoon, Playboy, Penthouse and national parodies, Off the Wall Street Journal and Like a Rolling Stone. He co-authored The Short Report: Good News for Guys 5’7” & Under, wrote for New York radio DJs and comics, worked with top comedy writers Larry Miller, Warren Leight, and Tony Hendra, and founded The New York Skitz comedy troupe. He studied improvisation with Chicago-based Second City.
Bookings for The Business Oracle can be made through his “channel,”Cary Bayer
He loves parties, businesses, churches, temples, bookstores, social clubs, country clubs, golf clubs, and especially “glee” clubs.
PH: (954) 788-3380
FX: (954) 786-1317
PH: (845) 679-5526
FX: (845) 679-6189
“The force that keeps the Heavenly bodies in place isn’t gravity, but levity.”
–The Business Oracle